Today, i decided not to focus on food for a change...hahaahaha...today i'm going to write abt my work...!!! urghh....for those of you who know me, u would know that since i graduated, i've been working at my present company til today..that means i have been here for more than 3 years now..for obvious reasons, i will not mention which company it is...
anyway...when i first joined...i came here with a very enthusiastic attitude ...i wanted to be the most hardworking and efficient employee for the company...there was a deep sense of loyalty i developed for the company..it was a classic "Live Company X, Die Company X" attitude i had...i quickly learnt the things needed, and also discovered how much of self satisfaction i could derive from the work place....over time, however tat enthusiasm slowly died down...work soon became ..work...my boss and i constantly could not see each other eye-to-eye when it comes to official work matters...i wanted to be quick, to the point and accurate...she wanted more than necessary, and often missing deadlines kind of attitude (how ironic coming from a boss, right?)...however, i always ended being on the receiving end whenever other ppl wanted to complain abt the missed deadlines and having to process more than necessary...
But that was not wat drove me over the edge to want to leave the company..what was worse were the physchological/ mental games my boss loves to have with me..one moment she's nice to you, next moment she ignores you completely...one moment you are her wing person, next moment you are just indifferent to her...one moment she says you are to do work of your level (as a Senior Exec), next moment she gives you menial, administrative work to do..urghh...it's not that i want to complain for doing these work..but worse, you end up doing everything in the department..instead of compensating you, she tells you we work not for money but for interest...hahaha....how silly is that..we all work for money (no matter how religious you are!!)...otherwise, what do i feed on...Grass?? Air??
It's not liek i havent tried to discuss all this with my boss..but u know..it's just not the same...i feel like saddam in the cartoon below(which describes perfectly how i feel when i am talking to my boss)...haha...
anyway, i wanted to leave the company...i was just not really happy...working more on an auto pilot mode...but i was also afraid to step out from my comfort zone...i'm already familiar with my work here...familiar with ppl here...and if i really endure all these for another, say 5 years, things might change and my boss will by then have retired....haha...
but after thinking through..i think its time for a change of environment...perhaps go out there and expand my abilities and skills more...it's scary though..so, do help by praying for me...that more windows of opportunity will open up to me..and that i have the wisdom, strength and courage to take up a new challenge!!
